Do I have to talk about everything in therapy?

No. You choose what you share and when you share it. You can take your time, and you can decide what feels right to talk about in each session.

In an initial session I will explain the process of therapy, answer any questions you have, and ask a few introductory questions to get a sense of your situation. This is for you to answer with as much or as little detail as feels comfortable. Some people have the answers ready; many people don’t, and that’s totally fine.

It is common to feel unsure before starting therapy. Many people worry they will be expected to go into painful experiences straight away, or that they will lose control of the conversation. These concerns make sense, especially if you have been through something difficult or are carrying feelings that feel private or hard to put into words.

In practice, therapy moves at your pace. A good therapeutic relationship is built on trust, and trust develops over time. You are not expected to tell your whole story in one session. You can begin wherever feels most manageable. That might be a current situation, a feeling you cannot quite name, or even the fact that you feel unsure about being there.

You are always in charge of what you say. If something feels too much to talk about, you can say so. If you are not ready to go into detail, that is respected. Therapy is about creating a space where you can feel safe enough to explore things when you are ready.

Some people find it helpful to share a little at a time. Others need longer to feel comfortable. There is no correct way to do therapy. What matters is that the process feels steady and contained for you.

If you have experienced sexual assault or another form of trauma, this can feel especially important. You will not be expected to describe events in detail. Early sessions often focus on building a sense of safety and helping you feel more grounded. Therapy isn’t about reliving painful experiences, it’s about making sense of them and their impact now. Trauma can feel like a knot in a timeline, one that keeps pulling you back into moments of distress. Good therapy goes slowly, helping those pulls to loosen over time.

Similarly, if you are grieving, you may not have clear words for what you are feeling. You do not need to explain or justify your grief. Therapy can help you make sense of it at your own pace.

The approach I use is collaborative. You and I work together to find a pace that feels manageable. Over time, many people find that as trust grows, it becomes easier to talk about things that once felt out of reach.

If you are based in Hove or the surrounding area and are thinking about starting individual or couples therapy, you are welcome to get in touch. You can ask questions and get a sense of how I work before deciding whether to book.